Tuesday, 27 September 2011

What Is The WOCOTD?

In a no-doubt-doomed-to-failure attempt to inspire myself update the blog regularly, I am instituting an occasional daily feature: v0idation's Word Or Concept Of The Day, or WOCOTD, if you will. In an interestingly self-referential way, this idea could actually be its own first item, but that seems a little too bleakly ironic for a Tuesday. So my inaugural Word Or Concept Of The Day will be...
A typical Lycranthrope display.

No, not lycanthrope, meaning werewolf, but LYCRANTHROPE, meaning, essentially, were-cyclist. One who transforms into a brightly-coloured two-wheeled menace at the slightest provocation. He typically arrives this way at work, and then after disappearing into a toilet, stairwell or large cupboard, reappears looking normal and human again. In the afternoon he will stop working a little before everybody else to give himself time for "the change". As well as the colourful plumage, the typical lycranthrope wears an expression of self-righteousness and disdain in the face of his tubbier, shamefully motorised colleagues.

Friday, 23 September 2011

Dark Lord of Ventolin

I was walking with small A to school this morning, when we noticed Edward Scissorhands on the path behind us. Far from being alarmed, A said "I think he's wearing a wig, Daddy". It soon became clear that Edward Cardboardfingers would be a better name for him, and after clocking several refugees from Fame and two giant bananas we deduced that the local high school must be having some sort of non-uniform day.

I dropped A off at school and started back, past a few footballers, some mad scientists and one guy in a purple morphsuit. I had mentally awarded the best outfit prize to a Mexican cowboy when I heard heavy asthmatic breathing coming from just around the corner. As I rounded the bend I came face-to-face with none other than Sauron, the Dark Lord of Mordor, dressed from head to toe in black velveteen and sporting a homemade cardboard helmet covered in silver foil. The poor guy (or girl - hard to tell really) was wheezing like a clogged hoover (which put me in mind of that other Dark Lord), but the overall effect was outstanding, and full marks to you, whoever you are. Kudos! You made me smile. Who says the youth of today lack imagination?

Wait, though...what if it wasn't a kid from the school...